I don't know if you've noticed yet, but it's starting to feel a tad bit nipply out. That, of course, signals the big man in the red suit is gearing up for his annual breaking and entering, pigskin extravaganza reaches a heinous roar and hapless TV execs take yet another jab at justifying their salaries after a poor fall showing. January is fast approaching, and a whole new crop of dramas, comedies and faux reality series rush to our TV sets, longing to be the next Desperate Housewives, yet each are two episodes away from being mounted beneath the guillotine. What can I say? The fickle American public is thirsty for blood. Can you blame them? You can't throw this much garbage at anyone and expect them not to get tired of taking out the trash. So this time around, they try to plug the gapping holes in their line-ups by assaulting us with star firepower (Jenna Elfman, Heather Graham, Vanessa Williams), dancing and skating with celebs, not to mention yet another Law & Order-esque rip-off. Better start digging those holes in the TV graveyard because in a few short months, we're going to need them.

Emily's Reasons Why Not (ABC) Mondays at 9 : Premieres January 9 - After turning up the sizzle factor during her guest spot as the ditsy shrink on Scrubs, Mercedes Lane, or Heather Graham if you prefer, breaks out to headline her own series based on the book by the same name. So the premise is Emily Sanders is single, successful and lonely after her beau was caught between the sheets with another. Emily sets out on the dating scene, compiling lists as to why bachelor number...umm...gets his walking papers. Why don't we just call her Carrie Bradshaw and be done with it? Graham certainly has the right assets and has proved she can pull off comedy. The real question is whether the scriptwriters and supporting cast will come to play.

Love Monkey (CBS) Tuesdays at 9 : Premieres January 17 - Love Monkey marks the most promising show to fall off the chuck wagon. Also pulled from the bookshelves, Love Monkey stars Tom Cavanagh (Ed) and Jason Priestley as a couple thirty-something guys, searching for love and success in their careers. The book was a crafty adventure across the pitfalls of the male dating existence so it will be interesting to see if they can retain those extra helpings of charm and charisma when the jump is made to the small screen. Maybe we can set one of these guys up with Emily for sweeps week.

The Jenna Elfman Show (CBS) Mondays at 9:30 : Premieres January 23 - I used to know someone who thought Jenna was the greatest juckster since Lucille Balle. While I'm not willing to go there, I will say her days as perky Dharma certainly secured her a loyal following which could serve her well in her new series. Based on a BBC comedy entitled According to Bex, Elfman wants what every woman wants -- an exciting career, good relations with the parental units and true love. The only problem is that men don't seem to want to cooperate. Originally entitled Everything I Know About Men, this puppy has been sitting around in CBS' cupboard for a while. Given the mixed success with British translations (the Office, Coupling), it makes you wonder if this is positively rancid or perfectly aged?

Crumbs (ABC) Mondays at 9:30 : Premieres January 12 - Lil' Kevin Arnold's all grown up now, returning to the small screen for the Lackluster Years. If only we were so lucky. From watching the promo spot, Crumbs looks like yet another formulaic comedy, propped up on a goofy premise. Basically, Fred Savage plays a struggling screenwriter who heads home to do his brotherly duty, helping out the family in the face of his "loony bin escaped" mother and "unable to keep Mr. happy in his pants" father. I'm thinking Arrested Development, but lacking the cleverness and the quirk on the side.

South Beach (UPN) Wednesdays at 9 : Premieres January 11 - Get those white suits and pink shirts out of moth balls because here comes Miami Vice. Err, not exactly. JLo brings us this tale of two friends (Marcus Coloma & Chris Johnson) escaping New York to find an old flame that just happens to be a super model in the making. They jump right into the glamorous, glitzy scene, which includes Vanessa Williams who clearly isn't saving the best for last. Really, JLo producing this puppy should tell you everything you need to know. Stick with your narcissistic Nip/Tuck surgeons who are carving these beauties up on the other side of town, or a couple channels up the dial in our reality.

Four Kings (NBC) Thursdays at 8:30 : Premieres January 5 - From the creators of Will and Grace, we get this testosterone fueled comedy about four childhood friends, living in New York. Life is busy pushing them to grow up, yet they're too busy clinging to their waning adolescents to notice. Seth Green, or the Napster, stars as one of our kings. Count on lots of humor circling chronic masturbation, slobbering over the fairer sex, and trashing their buds. Its got potential, and NBC thinks pretty highly of it, setting it beside established favorite like The Office, My Name is Earl and Will & Grace in their vie to recapture "must-see" Thursdays.

In Justice (ABC) Fridays at 9 : Premieres January 6 - Seems ABC was jealous that NBC had a hundred Law and Orders to its one Boston Legal, thus we have In Justice. Basically, it's a firm that lives its life on appeal. They find the most deserving cases where the police work was shoddy, filled with a lop-sided jury or Pinocchio-like testimony. Then they look to crack them open, to free the innocent. It might be compelling if we weren't already watching fourteen of these crime dramas.

The Book of Daniel (NBC) Fridays at 10 : Premieres January 6 - It seems like religious programming is all the rage these days with the success of the Passion and this week's sure fire hit The Chronicles of Narnia. That success hasn't always translated to television. Just ask Joan of Arcadia. The Book of Daniel sets its sights on a Episcopalian priest (Aidan Quinn) who talks to Jesus to absorb his family struggles, the brewing church politics, and the monkey on his back -- an addiction to pain killers. Will the Christians be able to see this flawed man as one of their own, or will they hoist him up onto the cross for pay for his transgressions?

Dancing with the Stars (ABC) Fridays at 8 : Premieres January 5 - Just cancel this crap now and save us from having to suffer through C-grade celebrities dancing. Look at it as a humanitarian cause for your fellow man this holiday season. People, change the channel, pickup a book, do something -- anything to save yourself from this mental black hole.

Skating with Celebrities (Fox) Mondays at 8 : Premieres January 18 - Not to be outdone, Fox enters the fray -- on ice. Of the two, this looks to be the more tolerable. I mean celebrities who couldn't make the cut for the Surreal Life (Debbie Gibson, Todd Bridges, Kristy Swanson) falling on their asses all night a la The Cutting Edge. Toe pick!

Check back throughout January as we give you the reviews on all the new television that is fit to be watched.